One of my goals that I set for myself for the new year, among other things, is to make more art that makes me happy.
I think I get too anxious about how others will receive my work. I find myself trying to analyze why one piece gets lots of commentary/pins/views/likes/favorites and another piece, which I worked much harder on, doesn't - and then I imagine trying to shape my future work around what has been popular in the past, and despising the thought. That's not what I want my art to be. I want to make something that I love - and very few pieces I've produced in the past few years have inspired anything but loathing from me. I am struck by doubt and guilt every time I pick up a pencil and try to sketch something that I think would be cool: I think,"What would X say if they saw this?" "I wonder if anyone would even like this?" "Am I wasting my time?"
This doesn't mean I will be ignoring my clients or commissions. They will get their work. I won't be posting the creation on any social media though. I will still be lurking in the art community and supporting my fellow artists. I may stagnate in followers or even lose them for not updating, but I think this is an experiment worth the risk.
I'm sorry for this very self-centered announcement. I hate posts where every sentence starts with "I" - but... I feel better just by the thought of getting this message out there. Maybe I won't be able to abstain from uploading, maybe it will only be for a year. MAYBE by the end I'll have made something so amazing and wonderful it will just spontaneously erupt onto the Internet. I don't know, but let's just see where this goes.
Listening to: birds
Reading: Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?